


Next time, buy some high heels!

by millygal



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-13
Updated: 2017-04-13
Packaged: 2018-10-18 09:23:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10613991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millygal/pseuds/millygal
Summary: I can feel where my legs are *meant* to end....





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for amberdreams prompt, Kevin/Sam BodySwap :) Pure crack here!

When offered a chance to stand head and shoulders, quite literally, above every other man on the planet, or at least in their own social circle, most guys would agree that being short really isn't that fun and yes, any help would be greatly appreciated.

Being the height of a high school girl... It's not always easy to say, get the girl, play the sport, hell, it's hard work even being seen at the bar! Not that Kevin's ever gone to a bar, no, he wouldn't do such a thing, being an AP star, or former AP star anyway.

Most men would jump at the chance to enhance their stature.

Most men **wouldn't** resort to magic and mayhem to gain an extra four inches on their legs.

The easiest ways to get a little extra in that area are quite simple; a hair style you need a step ladder to add product to, lifts in your shoes, heels _on_ the shoes with the lifts **in** them.

No one Kevin's ever encountered has gone full on bat shit crazy and decided in a drunken stupor that it'd be a wise decision to go trawling through the Men of Letter's archives for physical enhancement spells.

Until now.

"Oh crap!"

As he's dragging his now extremely long legs up to his chest in order to start rocking back and forward and yanking on fistfuls of what can only be described as silken Fabio-esque hair, which incidentally is way passed soft and touchable and he must remember to ask Sam where exactly he buys his shampoo, he hears a high pitched keening noise, followed swiftly by rapidly pounding feet running full tilt down the hallway towards him, "Double crap!"

He's all for hiding under the crazy-locator desk when he's slammed into by a whirling flailing ball of Asian anger under a bubbling over head of indignant steam.

"What the ever living fuck have you done!?"

"That's just weird, is that what the top of my head looks like?"

Sam untangles himself from his own massive limbs, which is all kinds of insane and strange and quite frankly disturbing, before slamming back onto Kevin's somewhat more pert than expected ass, "Weird, we're going with weird are we? Crazy, mental, idiotic, STUPID: Yes! Weird: UNDERSTATEMENT! What did you DO?"

Kevin flinches back from the down right murderous look in his own eyes, again with the weird, no scratch that, mental patient insane is what that is. He never knew he could look so rabid, even after all that time holed up on Garth's houseboat of unhygienic, "Look Sam, I...I mean...Oh hell, I got drunk, I went hunting, I found a spell."

Sam scrabbles backwards far enough to lean against the wall, and far enough away not to reach out and throttle himself, before raising a finely sculpted eyebrow, "And what, this spell was to be a giant pain in my ass? How exactly did we end up in each other's bodies? By the way, if you're going to try and bend the fabric of reality, please try doing it whilst wearing some BLOODY CLOTHES next time, there are parts of you I've seen today I will _never_ be able to erase from my memory!"

Kevin stops with his hand half way to swiping Sam's stupidly long hair out of his eyes and allows a curiously sneaky smirk to blossom on his lips.

"No, NO! don't even think about it, let's just say it's all in proportion and LEAVE IT at that, okay? And if you need to pee, tie a knot in it!"

Shaking his head, flushing all thoughts of a day spent in front of the mirror from his mind, Kevin splays his palms flat on the floor and tries to lift himself to his feet, "Woah! How do you get around on these things?"

Sam watches Kevin flail against the floor, legs slipping left and right, and winces at the thought of the pain he's going to be feeling once he gets back in his own body, "Dude, careful with the merchandise, just because you aren't allowed to play show and tell with yourself doesn't mean you need to do the splits and flatten anything!"

"But I can feel where my legs are supposed to end, and then I can feel where they actually end, man this is..."

"If you say weird once more, so help me god I'm gonna kick my own ass! Now, stop, sit, onto your knees and up."

Flashing Sam a grateful smile, realising he probably now has use of dimples that could floor a super model and ten paces, Kevin stumbles onto all fours before dragging himself to his feet.

Sam follows Kevin to his feet, **his** feet, and shoves him in the direction of the basement, "Just, keep it down would you, last thing we need is Dean coming stomping through here and finding us all mix and match!"

~~~~~~~~~

Sam sighs heavily and smears the greasy substance all over his bare chest, "Why exactly do we have to be half naked for this to work?"

Kevin smirks, coughs and looks down at his, Sam's, feet, "Dude, you have hairy toes. Oh, yeah, sorry, um apparently we need to be **One with Ourselves!** for the reversal to stick."

Sam growls under his breath before taking a final swipe across his torso, "Yeah well, you haven't got a single chest hair, it's creepy man, haven't you hit puberty yet?"

They're about ready to start chanting and lighting shit that ought not to be lit in such close proximity to bare skin, when they hear the oh so familiar strains of Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven coming in their direction, fast, "Oh for fuck..."

" _There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold, And she's buying a stairway to heaven. When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed, With a word she can get what_....in the HELL have I just walked in on!? **THUD** "

"It's fine, just leave him there, he's hit his head enough over the years, it can't possibly scramble any more brain cells."

"After we're switched back, you wanna swap him with Crowley?"


End file.
